If youâ??re a massage enthusiast traveling to Thailand, thinking about experiencing total bliss and want to be rubbed the â??Right Wayâ?, you will instantly realize within the first 30 minutes or less that you've CUM to the right place.
North and South Pattaya Beaches have hundreds of MPâ??s scattered all over town as well as the adjoining towns of Jom Tien Beach and Naklua Beach. It would take you years to experience what these beach towns have to offer.
Luckily you will have me, Thomas H. Edward Cat, (but you can call me Sonny for short) as your guide and fellow blogger of this infamous website of MPâ??s around the world. My qualifications are simply as follows: World Traveler in search of hot wet pussy. I've been to Rio De Janeiro, Costa Rica, Philippines, Dominican Republic, Japan, Cambodia, Taiwan, Hong Kong, and now reside in the sex capital of the world, the Disneyland for Adults, (Sorry Mickey) South Pattaya Beach, Thailand. Where women are women, the men are men and some women are men and some men are women. There is something here for everyone and everything. Personally I donâ??t do Gay MPâ??S, BUTT if you like that sort of thing, feel free to drop the soap in the shower and have no fear of picking it up.

Kinds of Massages
(Please note: The currency that is used here is the Thai Baht. Currently (as of Oct. 2012) the Thai bht is about 31 bht to one US dollar. So if something is 100 bht, the cost in US dollar will be about $3.)

[b]Foot Massage:[/b]
First you have your basic foot massage which will run you anywhere from 100 bht ($3) and 200 bht($6) for one hour. In most places you will sit in a really nice comfortable chair, air-conditioned room with soft music playing. A western style toilet and shower will be available for your needs. Your feet will be washed first by hand, cold water will be served before and during the massage, after hot tea or coffee will be offered as well. If you are wearing long pants they will provide you with a pair of loose fitting shorts at no extra charge so they can massage your entire leg easier.
Your foot and leg will be massaged by a young Thai girl or older Thai woman. She will use, if requested a tiger balm ointment on your legs. A fragrant coconut massage oil will be used also and at the end of the massage she will wipe down your feet and legs with a warm to hot towel. A nice tip is expected and deserved. 20 bht is a starting price of tips but if you want to make the girl happy you can tip her 50-100 bht. I know a number of MPâ??s that will offer the 100 bht foot massage. These MPâ??s will be in the areas that a lot of the tourists do not know about.

Thai Body Massage: (strictly a non sexual massage in most places)
A Thai massage is more energizing and rigorous than more classic forms of massage. A Thai massage is also called Thai yoga massage, because the therapist uses his or her hands, knees, legs, and feet to move you into a series of yoga-like stretches. Many people say that Thai massage is like doing yoga without any work.
Muscle compression, joint mobilization, and acupressure are also used during treatment. People describe Thai massage as both relaxing and energizing.

A Thai massage is usually done on a padded mat on the floor. You will share the room with other customers, hence no privacy.
No oil is applied, so you are fully dressed. If you are wearing clothing that will prevent the masseuse from doing her job correctly, every MP will provide you with the proper clothing, or you will be covered by a big towel, no extra charge. A typical Thai massage is 60 minutes to two hours long.
Many people find that a Thai massage has the following benefits: relaxes, reduces stress, improves circulation, increases energy, increases flexibility, improves range of motion, and centers the mind and body.
Note: You can request a soft, medium or intense massage. You can also request they massage only in certain places you have pain. I like a head, neck and shoulder massage with a foot massage at the end.

[u]Full Body Oil Massage[/u] (Sexual and Non Sexual MP Procedures)
An oil massage is the most relaxing in my opinion. Oil massages will run anywhere from 200-300 bht.($6-10) This fee is just for the massage. Her tip is extra. Weâ??ll get to that later.

Tip #1: When you walk up to a massage parlor in most places in Pattaya, there will be anywhere from 1-10 girls standing outside wearing the shopâ??s uniforms or the girls regular clothing. Usually if the girls are wearing the traditional Thai clothing or specially made MP uniforms, this MP will probably not offer full service. Possible a hand job at best, which the girls call â??the specialâ?.
The typical oil massage is done in a private setting. A bed or mattress will be on the floor or a massage table will be used. A pillow, towel and bed covering will be provided as shown in this photo. Some places will have a room with a locked door, some will have a curtain for a door, some will be curtained all around, and some will have very thin paneled walls to separate each stall. Personally I like the room with a locked door.

Tip:2 If your room has a locked door and paneled walls, you will probably get all the treats you want.
You will be asked to take all your clothes off and undress.

Tip:3 If your masseuse leaves the room while you undress and prepare for your shower, thereâ??s a chance she will not offer full service.

A towel will be given to you and you will be escorted to a bathroom with a shower and toilet. Soap will be provided as well.

Tip:4 If your girl takes a shower first, it is a good inclination that she will provide you with a sex massage.

Tip:5 If the girl undresses and takes a shower with you and washes every inch of your body, there is a 100% chance you will have a great time.
In some places the girl will give you a massage just wearing her bra and panties or little shorts and tank top. If she is wearing this type of clothing, you will probably be offered full service.
Ok, so youâ??re back from your shower and you enter your massage room where your massage girl is waiting. You lie down on the mattress, stomach first. It all depends on the girl on how shy or not shy she is. She may make her sexual moves on you immediately or perform her massage and wait til you turn over.

Tip:6 If she touches your balls a bunch of times while she massages your back, this is a good hint that when you turn over you will receive some sort of sexual gratification. She is priming you so that when you do turn over, youâ??re ready to blast off.

The question always comes up, especially if it is your first time with your massage girl. She will ask you what you want to do with her. She will give you, most of the time a pretty good 30-40 min. massage and leave the rest of the time for the sexual massage. Most will ask you, â??how much you pay me?â? The prices below are good suggestions. Depending on each of your budgets, paying them more is ok if youâ??re ok with it.

Tip:7 It is a good idea if you can get her to let you know before you go upstairs to the room, what she will do to you and how much it will cost. A lot of them will not tell you that and try to get you upstairs in the room to get you so horny that you will pay anything. This does not happen often but once in a while you get a jerk.

Prices:
Hand job can cost 300 bth to 1,000 bht. ($10-30)
300-500 is OK. ($10-15)
A blow job can cost 500-1,000. ($15-30) 500-700 is OK. ($15-21)
Full Service, Hot dog in the bun, blowjob, handjob, a little kissing, licking, eating her and sucking on her tits, (FULL SERVICE) will be from 500-1500. ($15-45)
700-1,000 is OK. ($21-30)

Tip:8 If she is hot and you really like her a lot and plan on seeing her again, give her what she asks for but no more than the prices suggested above. The prices above are for the conservative shopper like myself and these prices are very well accepted.

Taking your massage girl to a short time room
Here in Thailand you can take any girl you meet back to your room or to other places in Thailand. This includes any of your Thai massage girls you meet. It will be up to the MP what they will charge you to take her out to another location. Usually it will be the cost of whatever massage you want her to give you.
Example: Oil massage, 200 bht for the MP shop. 100-300 for the short time room. Her tip for her personal favors, lets say 1,000. So youâ??re looking at about 1500 bht.
Some of the guys like myself take our favorite MP girls to a short time hotel room. Short time rooms in hotels costs 100-300 for a couple of hours. There is more privacy and the room is much larger. Also, these short time rooms are great because if you are married or have a Thai girlfriend staying with you in your hotel room or apt., this give you a chance to get some strange while your other strange is waiting for you to come back from your â??golfing tripâ?.

Taking the girl back to your hotel room
This is popular with the guys who come here for a period of time. Some of the hotels will charge a â??joiner feeâ? for bringing a girl to your room. There are many hotels that will NOT charge a fee. This fee could be 500-1,000 bht.
The good thing about this is that your massage girl will know where to come next time as she will take a hotel card with her when she leaves. 99% of the girls have a cell phone so reaching any girl that you met or had sex with while on your vacation can be summoned to your beckon call.

Taking your MP girl Indefinitely
I have had some longtime sexual romances with some of these Mp girls. I find them much sweeter than the Go Go or beer bar girls. Most of them love to go with the customer for days or weeks. If she wants to, she will stay with you everyday and you pay her at the end of each day. Never pay a girl in advance and if she asks for the money up front, there is something wrong.
Tip: If youâ??re gonna take a girl for more than one night, make sure there is a mutual connection between the both of you. A lot of the girls will go with anyone, no matter what they look like to make their money. If this doesnâ??t bother you then have fun. Itâ??s much better if you feel there is some like or a little love going on.


Kinds of Massage Parlors
There are three different kinds of massage parlors in Pattaya Beach. The first kind of MP, or as I refer to them is a â??Level 1â? MP. These are massage parlors that are found in your regular tourist area. What I mean by a â??regular tourist areaâ? are the areas that cater to the tourists who desire a non-sexual massage. You know, the husband and wife type MPâ??s with fat ugly, but very strong and very talented Thai women who have gone to a massage school and graduated with a diploma. They will be able to give you a terrific foot massage, Thai massage, oil massage, and a head neck and shoulder massage. These MPâ??s will most likely not offer any type of sexual gratification. The best chance youâ??d have is to get the girlâ??s number and arrange for her to come to your hotel room. If she is willing to come to your room, there is a better chance she will perform various sex acts.
Level 2 MP is where the girls will most likely give you a handjob after your oil massage.
Level 3 MP is where there is a 99% chance of every girl in that MP will perform a minimum of a handjob or blow job and most likely full service. Also they will offer a two girl massage. This is pretty wild and fun. Normally if the prices are 200 for an oil massage, you would double that price and pay each girl whatever they want for a tip.

Picking the MP and the Girl
Some of the MPâ??s are 24 hours and I will post the ones that are for each MP later. When you approach an MP, most of the time there will be girls outside smiling at you as you walk up to them. They will try to entice you to get a massage at their MP. Some MPâ??s have anywhere from 4 girls in each MP to 15 or more. The attractive ones are usually working most of the time for obvious reasons and are rarely outside or in view as they are in the rooms working. As soon as they walk outside to join the lesser attractive girls, they are picked quicker than the other ones. So, a good way to get to see these prettier ones, take a 1-2 hour foot massage downstairs on the ground floor. In that amount of time you will see all the girls on that shift come down from their massages with their customers. If you see one that you would like to take after your foot massage, get her name and make an appointment to ensure a hook up with her.

Shifts the girls Work
Some massage parlors open at about 10:00 am and close at 11-12 midnight. The hotter girls I find work the later shift, like 3pm til closing. The reason for these girls to show up that later for work is that they sometimes go with a customer after finishing work and sleep at a customerâ??s hotel room. They will make their money at the MP and then a bonus for a longtime sex romp.

Etiquette on Appearance For better Results
Most Thai women are extremely clean conscious. They shower before and after sex and sometimes during sex. They almost never smell â??down thereâ? or the rest of their body. They praise themselves on smelling and looking beautiful all the time. They also enjoy men to do the same.
The following tips are for you to increase your chances of having a better time with your girl and for them to actually like you for you and not just for the money you pay them:

1.) Clean shaven. They donâ??t like having their pussies licked or you kissing every part of their body and having their skin scratched, irritated or tickled by your beard or mustache.
2.) Body odor is a complete turnoff for them. Cigarette smoke from your mouth, body or hair. Alcohol breath or being drunk. Body odor when you first meet them before the massage.
3.) Always smile and be courteous. A sense of humor works too. Not loud or pushy.
4.) Always bring condoms from home, ones that you are used to using and like to use. They have condoms here that are ok but ones from home are usually better. Always use condoms when banging chicks in the sex industry.

Buy a Cell Phone on your trip
Just about every girl youâ??ll meet in this town will own a cell phone. It is the best way to hook up with your girls you meet every day. A new cheap Nokia with no camera costs about 700 bht. ($21) The best investment youâ??ll make while youâ??re here. Some phones from the US and other countries will work here as well.